22 years young. Praise the Lord for this blessing. I have much to be thankful for and cannot help but remember past bdays that have proven again and again of His continuous blessings.
Homemade cakes, funnel cake, round cakes, sheet cakes, cupcakes, cheesecake, ice cream cake, made to order cake, store bought cakes, and the multitude of cakes people have brought and made for me. Too many people deserve this shout out for my bday cakeness.
Who could forget all the ice cream either? Ben & Jerry's, Cold Stone, etc. etc.
In turn, shout out to the way too many people who have prepared/eaten/bought bday lunches/dinners for/with me. I'm so glad to have eaten and shared food with y'all.
Shout out to the many folks that have brought me gifts. To add to that, regardless of bday or holiday gift, whenever I use the gift I am reminded that you thought of me when getting it. Shout out to y'all.
Surprises galore. Enough said.
Kudos to CM for composing and beat-boxing with others that song for my 21st. Mad respect and love for you all.
Praise the Lord for allowing me to know and celebrate life with all these people.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
full circle
2 years.
My thoughts and ramblings have been written here for that long now. It's been 2 years since I've dealt with my so called "quarter-life crisis". 2 years ago, I dared to write about God and my walks with Him. Who knew I'd still be writing 2 years later?
Writing first started just shortly after I turned 20. I had been dealing with my second "first year" since my transfer out of A-Skool and what seemed like an eternity of finding the "right major". It was through writing that I hoped to find some sort of solace. 2 years later I find myself a little more tranquil and on my way to finish the "pre-life" track.
I wonder where God will lead me in the next 2 maybe 3 years? 20? 30?
Friday, March 26, 2010
giving up life for life
I had my head shaved again for St. Baldrick's yesterday. Shout out to the folks who came out to see me go "bald" and the people who donated. From this seemingly simple act, I cannot help but think about the kids who lose their hair to chemo. The pain and suffering from the side effects of chemo that they go through. The people in my family who have gone through the same ordeal.
I am yet again reminded and question myself as to why I support such causes...
Blood. Hair. Time.
All of which I've donated and given up in the last 2-5 years all for different causes. From an outside perspective it is, I daresay, masochistic.
The blood I donate is put aside for somebody who needs it. The hair I give up is in solidarity with the kids with cancer and to raise money for childhood cancer research. The time and manpower I offer for PCCV in promotion of being pro-life.
It took me until now to realize that I've been in support of saving life this whole time.
Blood to save somebody's life. Hair for money to save a child's life. Time to save an unborn child's life.
Is what I'm doing for my fellow man going to save a life? Am I saving people from death of the body like Christ did? I realize that although what I have done is a good thing, Christ does it better. He gave up His life so our souls could continue living. Forever.
Sharing His Word to our fellow man is the best kind of "supporting a cause".
I am yet again reminded and question myself as to why I support such causes...
Blood. Hair. Time.
All of which I've donated and given up in the last 2-5 years all for different causes. From an outside perspective it is, I daresay, masochistic.
The blood I donate is put aside for somebody who needs it. The hair I give up is in solidarity with the kids with cancer and to raise money for childhood cancer research. The time and manpower I offer for PCCV in promotion of being pro-life.
It took me until now to realize that I've been in support of saving life this whole time.
Blood to save somebody's life. Hair for money to save a child's life. Time to save an unborn child's life.
Is what I'm doing for my fellow man going to save a life? Am I saving people from death of the body like Christ did? I realize that although what I have done is a good thing, Christ does it better. He gave up His life so our souls could continue living. Forever.
Sharing His Word to our fellow man is the best kind of "supporting a cause".
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
我會說English?
I was translating a poem for class one morning when I stumbled across a word that I had no idea how to spell in English. "Fiery" was the thorn in my side. F-I-R-E-Y? F-I-R-Y? The online dictionary confirmed it. Why in the world are the "r" and the "e" switched around?
The daily struggle of learning and relearning languages is nothing new. As for majoring in the Chinese language, it always brings up the issue of how does one translate certain words and phrases to sound the most "correct" as well as learning and relearning certain features of one's own native tongue. In turn, it reminds me of the many reasons why I've decided to major in my supposed mother tongue. Growing up as a child of immigrants, I've always dealt with my parents and relatives' struggle to learn English. Correcting their broken English while in return they correcting my broken Chinese was the constant exchange in our households.
That morning was a reminder of the daily struggle of dealing with a language. The immigrants and/or refugees who come to a foreign land, dealing with the language barrier. The embarrassment, the trouble, the etc. etc. of learning a new tongue. The thorn in my side. The thorn in anybody's side. Paul hit that nail dead on with 2 Corinthians 12.
The daily struggle of learning and relearning languages is nothing new. As for majoring in the Chinese language, it always brings up the issue of how does one translate certain words and phrases to sound the most "correct" as well as learning and relearning certain features of one's own native tongue. In turn, it reminds me of the many reasons why I've decided to major in my supposed mother tongue. Growing up as a child of immigrants, I've always dealt with my parents and relatives' struggle to learn English. Correcting their broken English while in return they correcting my broken Chinese was the constant exchange in our households.
That morning was a reminder of the daily struggle of dealing with a language. The immigrants and/or refugees who come to a foreign land, dealing with the language barrier. The embarrassment, the trouble, the etc. etc. of learning a new tongue. The thorn in my side. The thorn in anybody's side. Paul hit that nail dead on with 2 Corinthians 12.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
the houses that God built
God has a tendency to remind me of things learned but forgotten. But when remembered, it is quite the refill.
CGC had service in the fellowship hall today, as opposed to the usual place of the gym. The gym was being used as a temporary shelter for the homeless they were taking care of for the week.
Sitting in the fellowship hall, I was reminded of the many house churches that take place around the world as well as the couple times CCF held house church when services were canceled because of that ridonkolous snow.
Why do we have church? Why do we go to church? What is a church? What is the Church?
Revelation 19 describes Christ as warrior ready and willing to fight for His bride, the Church. On the same note, Paul writes in Ephesians 6 that we are called to don the armor of God in order to fight for Him as well.
How devoted those early Christ-followers must have been when they were just starting out. To have met in peoples' homes. To have sung hymns without the music. To have practiced in the face of persecution. Even today, the same struggles continue.
They knew what these meetings were for. They knew this one body that Paul writes of in 1 Corinthians 12. They knew why all this mattered.
How wonderful it was for them to know and for us now to know this thing called fellowship. κοινωνία. 團契.
CGC had service in the fellowship hall today, as opposed to the usual place of the gym. The gym was being used as a temporary shelter for the homeless they were taking care of for the week.
Sitting in the fellowship hall, I was reminded of the many house churches that take place around the world as well as the couple times CCF held house church when services were canceled because of that ridonkolous snow.
Why do we have church? Why do we go to church? What is a church? What is the Church?
Revelation 19 describes Christ as warrior ready and willing to fight for His bride, the Church. On the same note, Paul writes in Ephesians 6 that we are called to don the armor of God in order to fight for Him as well.
How devoted those early Christ-followers must have been when they were just starting out. To have met in peoples' homes. To have sung hymns without the music. To have practiced in the face of persecution. Even today, the same struggles continue.
They knew what these meetings were for. They knew this one body that Paul writes of in 1 Corinthians 12. They knew why all this mattered.
How wonderful it was for them to know and for us now to know this thing called fellowship. κοινωνία. 團契.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
dancing madly
March Madness.
So begins yet another month long disruption to life. The phenomenon that entails people yelling at TV screens, compulsively checking scores, cringing as one sees another team on their bracket bite the dust, and countless other fanatical practices. All of which makes post-season college basketball even more fun to watch.
Bring it.
So begins yet another month long disruption to life. The phenomenon that entails people yelling at TV screens, compulsively checking scores, cringing as one sees another team on their bracket bite the dust, and countless other fanatical practices. All of which makes post-season college basketball even more fun to watch.
Bring it.
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Cackalacky on My Mind (iii)
"It's just a house."
Says Mr. Fredricksen to Russell as they watch his house fall beneath the clouds in Up.
Conversations that have engrossed my mind, that started early in the morning and gone on late into the night over some days' time, have been on my mind. That and the millions of other insights that appear, reappear, clash, and fight in my head over the span of this week. Needless to say, I'm still mulling over them. All of them.
Cooking always seems to be the default when it comes to these times of intense thought. Herbed mashed potatoes, failed risotto turned fried rice, another batch of fried rice, brownies, the whole dumpling process (flour, meat, and all), short ribs, napa cabbage galore, etc. etc. were all products of the process.
Mr. Fredricksen's house was the last thing of livelihood for him, but he realized that there are more important things. Much more important. I've lost count the many times I've been reading/reminded of Jesus' teaching for us in Matthew 6:25-33.
Lord, I'm listening. Help me continue finding Your kingdom and righteousness.
Says Mr. Fredricksen to Russell as they watch his house fall beneath the clouds in Up.
Conversations that have engrossed my mind, that started early in the morning and gone on late into the night over some days' time, have been on my mind. That and the millions of other insights that appear, reappear, clash, and fight in my head over the span of this week. Needless to say, I'm still mulling over them. All of them.
Cooking always seems to be the default when it comes to these times of intense thought. Herbed mashed potatoes, failed risotto turned fried rice, another batch of fried rice, brownies, the whole dumpling process (flour, meat, and all), short ribs, napa cabbage galore, etc. etc. were all products of the process.
Mr. Fredricksen's house was the last thing of livelihood for him, but he realized that there are more important things. Much more important. I've lost count the many times I've been reading/reminded of Jesus' teaching for us in Matthew 6:25-33.
Lord, I'm listening. Help me continue finding Your kingdom and righteousness.
Cackalacky on My Mind (ii)
"I'm going to play something for you."
Once again I was amazed and enthralled by the genius of Chopin, courtesy of CM who played oh so beautifully. Prelude No. 15 a.k.a. "Raindrop" was the piece that resonated so, and it just so happens to be raining as I write this. Mmm, that made my day.
An added treat was JW's rendition of "A Maiden's Prayer". Kudos.
Music from the piano. What would life sound like without it?
Once again I was amazed and enthralled by the genius of Chopin, courtesy of CM who played oh so beautifully. Prelude No. 15 a.k.a. "Raindrop" was the piece that resonated so, and it just so happens to be raining as I write this. Mmm, that made my day.
An added treat was JW's rendition of "A Maiden's Prayer". Kudos.
Music from the piano. What would life sound like without it?
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Cackalacky on My Mind
Currently Spring Breaking.
It started with a hotpot banquet at YL's house. Mad props and shout out to his gracious and hospitable family for hosting CCF. The next day were our excursions in Short Pump which ended with bubble tea from TT Lounge before we went our separate ways.
Part II was roadtrippin' to North Carolina. CM, JW, and Chopin were my traveling buddies who brought lively conversation and music as we headed south. We stop over in Wake Forest for some b-e-a-u-tiful BBQ before we turn in for the night at CM's maison.
The first thing I see at CM's were books. Books galore. I was instantly in love. It reminded me of my own love affair with books. How I beginning at five years of life would read hours on end, book after book. How I've accumulated a sizable library myself. How this love affair continues today with me still spending countless hours in libraries and bookstores enjoying the presence of written word.
Adding more to the academia splurging were visits to the quaint little town of Chapel Hill and that of Durham. Of course there was more tasting of that beautiful Carolina BBQ slipped in between. The day ended with more singing and...milkshakes!
But in the midst of academical splurgement, I can't help but realize how much stuff I learn/relearn about life away from the school setting...
Friday, March 5, 2010
passing on that light (ii)
It is official.
An email that has been sitting in my "Drafts" folder for 3 months has been sent out. Many times I've read and reread this letter. Many times I've been reluctant to send it.
My last email letter to the CCF mailing list.
It is done.
An email that has been sitting in my "Drafts" folder for 3 months has been sent out. Many times I've read and reread this letter. Many times I've been reluctant to send it.
My last email letter to the CCF mailing list.
It is done.
passing on that light
So I realize yet again that the hours of 2-4am is when I write and philosophize the most. So here we go...
In class today I was lectured on how much the Korean people invest so much time and effort into their children's education. So intense is their devotion it is even to the point in which the government will personally step in and help.
Of course this got me thinking about my own education. How much time and effort have I invested in mine? In the same thought processes, I realize it was almost 5 years ago that I applied for college and is now 4 years ago that I've been accepted and now about to finish. Oh, where has the time gone?
On another note, last night was the last CCF Core Group meeting I got to chair. Each Core Group meeting I've attended or chaired has always been emotionally and spiritually charged. This one was no exception. As we all celebrated the welcoming of our new president and the end of the meeting with crepes provided by our wonderful adviosrs, I could not help but think back to the ones of the past that were held in that wonderful room we call the Fishbowl.
Many people part of Core Group past and present were conferred there. Many discussions about how God is moving us were discussed there. The last 3 (including our current) presidents have been conferred there. So much has occurred in such a space and I pray that the Moleskin I've been carrying for 4 years has documented each one well enough.
Despite this, questions keep popping up. Was I capable enough? Through His hands, was my work good enough? Did I say the right things? Did I do enough? Is this the legacy I want to leave behind?
Whatever the answers maybe, I need not worry. I have no doubt in my mind that our current group of CCFers will continue pursuing to establish His Kingdom here on earth. How wonderful is His grace and love for humanity!
In class today I was lectured on how much the Korean people invest so much time and effort into their children's education. So intense is their devotion it is even to the point in which the government will personally step in and help.
Of course this got me thinking about my own education. How much time and effort have I invested in mine? In the same thought processes, I realize it was almost 5 years ago that I applied for college and is now 4 years ago that I've been accepted and now about to finish. Oh, where has the time gone?
On another note, last night was the last CCF Core Group meeting I got to chair. Each Core Group meeting I've attended or chaired has always been emotionally and spiritually charged. This one was no exception. As we all celebrated the welcoming of our new president and the end of the meeting with crepes provided by our wonderful adviosrs, I could not help but think back to the ones of the past that were held in that wonderful room we call the Fishbowl.
Many people part of Core Group past and present were conferred there. Many discussions about how God is moving us were discussed there. The last 3 (including our current) presidents have been conferred there. So much has occurred in such a space and I pray that the Moleskin I've been carrying for 4 years has documented each one well enough.
Despite this, questions keep popping up. Was I capable enough? Through His hands, was my work good enough? Did I say the right things? Did I do enough? Is this the legacy I want to leave behind?
Whatever the answers maybe, I need not worry. I have no doubt in my mind that our current group of CCFers will continue pursuing to establish His Kingdom here on earth. How wonderful is His grace and love for humanity!
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
café ponderings
Lauryn Hill once said everything is everything. I still don't fully understand what that means. Taking it at face value it is true but of course, there must be more to this than just this meaning.
I realize more and more that our God is the god of everything. One Sunday night after dinner a couple weeks ago, me and a couple of friends sit in Mr. Edwin Alderman's café prolonging our procrastination by discussing philosophical issues. What race does one put down on standardized tests? What was wrong with the government if a coup d'etat occurs? Why do we borrow so heavily from the French language terms for war when the French don't fight? Why do we burn palm leaves for Ash Wednesday? Is it worth buying the stuff people sell on infomercials?
All the while we occasionally look up at the wall of TV's broadcasting news from all over the world. Although heavily engrossed in the conversation, I could not help but notice the many different languages being displayed on each screen. Al Jazeera broadcasting a discussion among 3 important looking people, stock prices flashing across in Hindi, headlines in Polish, and of course CNN in español. I was feeling more and more helpless at the fact that I could not understand nor read what was going on.
It was at that moment that everything just seemed so surreal. I was watching and seeing everything happening around me but paying even closer attention to everybody and everything that no one would care to think twice about. A guy walking with his head held a little bit too high. A girl with a Slipknot shirt on with pink shorts. An old man in an easy chair quietly sipping at his cup and typing away on his Mac. God created these people. God also created the little things such as scones and hot chocolate for us to enjoy. God allowed us to speak so many different languages. Why are we so fearfully and wonderfully made?
I marvel once again at the fact that everything is possible through Him.
I realize more and more that our God is the god of everything. One Sunday night after dinner a couple weeks ago, me and a couple of friends sit in Mr. Edwin Alderman's café prolonging our procrastination by discussing philosophical issues. What race does one put down on standardized tests? What was wrong with the government if a coup d'etat occurs? Why do we borrow so heavily from the French language terms for war when the French don't fight? Why do we burn palm leaves for Ash Wednesday? Is it worth buying the stuff people sell on infomercials?
All the while we occasionally look up at the wall of TV's broadcasting news from all over the world. Although heavily engrossed in the conversation, I could not help but notice the many different languages being displayed on each screen. Al Jazeera broadcasting a discussion among 3 important looking people, stock prices flashing across in Hindi, headlines in Polish, and of course CNN in español. I was feeling more and more helpless at the fact that I could not understand nor read what was going on.
It was at that moment that everything just seemed so surreal. I was watching and seeing everything happening around me but paying even closer attention to everybody and everything that no one would care to think twice about. A guy walking with his head held a little bit too high. A girl with a Slipknot shirt on with pink shorts. An old man in an easy chair quietly sipping at his cup and typing away on his Mac. God created these people. God also created the little things such as scones and hot chocolate for us to enjoy. God allowed us to speak so many different languages. Why are we so fearfully and wonderfully made?
I marvel once again at the fact that everything is possible through Him.
Monday, March 1, 2010
celebrating life: before, now, after
First and foremost, it's MARCH!!! Where has the time gone???
Second, Happy Birthday Chopin!!! He'd be 200 today. In celebrating that, I've been listening to his music of course. Even as I type, I've been sitting in Newcomb Lounge listening to this guy play countless pieces of Chopin's genius. OOOOhhhh, sooo goood!
To add to that goodness, yesterday was unexpected goodness. Duke was playing here last night and it would be the last home game I could attend as a student (question mark?). So I met up with JW to watch this prelude to MARCH MADNESS!
This game was painful to watch. True, Duke is the no. 1 seed in the ACC this season, but this was ridiculous. At one point there was almost a 30 point lead. The crowd cringed at every missed shot. Verdict...67-49. We didn't even break 50 points.
Anyways, afterward JW asked if I could help move her stuff from CM's place so she could go home. No problem, I'll do it and head to this group project thing later at 10pm. I drove over there, go up the stairs, and...SURPRISE! I was very confused at that moment. Why are CCF folks here?
I cannot applaud nor give enough props to the ladies that planned this. So apparently this was my surprise bday party. 1 month early?!? Usually I get the most joy surprising people on their bdays, but this one was GOOD. We celebrated for a while but I had to dip out, I was already running late for this meeting.
As soon as I got to my car, I got a call from the group project folks. We meetin' tomorrow? Cool. I went back and planned to celebrate some more, but not without some of my own tricks waiting for them.
Knocking. Didn't DC just leave? SURPRISE! I think I made 5 people jump back. This was the cherry to my sundae. hehehe.
To make a long story short, THANKS/APPLAUSE/KUDOS to all the ladies that planned/schemed and people that showed up for the pre-bday festivities. I am truly and very wonderfully blessed and grateful to know such a bunch.
Second, Happy Birthday Chopin!!! He'd be 200 today. In celebrating that, I've been listening to his music of course. Even as I type, I've been sitting in Newcomb Lounge listening to this guy play countless pieces of Chopin's genius. OOOOhhhh, sooo goood!
To add to that goodness, yesterday was unexpected goodness. Duke was playing here last night and it would be the last home game I could attend as a student (question mark?). So I met up with JW to watch this prelude to MARCH MADNESS!
This game was painful to watch. True, Duke is the no. 1 seed in the ACC this season, but this was ridiculous. At one point there was almost a 30 point lead. The crowd cringed at every missed shot. Verdict...67-49. We didn't even break 50 points.
Anyways, afterward JW asked if I could help move her stuff from CM's place so she could go home. No problem, I'll do it and head to this group project thing later at 10pm. I drove over there, go up the stairs, and...SURPRISE! I was very confused at that moment. Why are CCF folks here?
I cannot applaud nor give enough props to the ladies that planned this. So apparently this was my surprise bday party. 1 month early?!? Usually I get the most joy surprising people on their bdays, but this one was GOOD. We celebrated for a while but I had to dip out, I was already running late for this meeting.
As soon as I got to my car, I got a call from the group project folks. We meetin' tomorrow? Cool. I went back and planned to celebrate some more, but not without some of my own tricks waiting for them.
Knocking. Didn't DC just leave? SURPRISE! I think I made 5 people jump back. This was the cherry to my sundae. hehehe.
To make a long story short, THANKS/APPLAUSE/KUDOS to all the ladies that planned/schemed and people that showed up for the pre-bday festivities. I am truly and very wonderfully blessed and grateful to know such a bunch.
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